Let’s talk about change.
You’ve experienced plenty of change working for 30, 40 or 50 years, buying a home, perhaps child rearing, moving, home improvement, stress, more work, vacations, launching children, more stress and more work filled your time and brought change and growth throughout your life. Now you’re anticipating retirement, and you may be looking forward to a life that either doesn’t change quite so much or in which change is under your control.
Expect change
Change is a fact of life, from minuscule modifications, like a favorite restaurant closing, to overwhelming developments, as in a job change, the loss of a loved one, or a move across the country. Whether it’s desirable change or painful change, self-initiated or unexpected, it’s all change.
How do you react to minor adjustments and major upheavals? Does one bother you more than the other?
Personally, I like to know what my days will look like. Unexpected changes to my daily schedule are challenging for me, and I am asking myself why. I guess I don’t want my plans messed up. Am I afraid of losing control or of running out of time? Could be. However, major changes are not as difficult. As a child, we moved several times, and I don’t remember being traumatized by such a significant change. My husband and I have gone to a number of different churches over the years, which for some is a problematic change, but not for me. Maybe I need time to adjust and major changes take time.
Expect change, examine your reactions to it, and if you need time to adjust to upcoming change, face it as early as possible and set your expectations accordingly.
Prepare for Change
If you google ‘handling change,’ you will see articles like 7 Steps to Handle Change and 10 Ways to Cope With Big Change, and much of the advice is common sense; eat right, exercise, seek support, keep consistent schedules, etc. Fine.
Both of the linked articles suggest keeping your routine as stable as possible, but a recent retiree has 8-10 hours a day that are suddenly unstructured. You will get up every morning to your routine – maybe a workout, shower, read the paper and/or the Bible, check email…and then what? The first hour or two of your day may be consistent, but the rest will be wildly adjusted. For some of you, that sounds like an adventure. For others, well, you’d rather not think about it.
I admit, I produce an aggressive to-do list every week and find it very satisfying to check off my daily to-dos. Recently, I’ve had to adjust my schedule, delete tasks, and expect to accomplish less due to an increase in a caregiving role. It’s a correct use of my time, in line with my priorities, and a shift I knew was coming, but it still took me a while to come to terms with this change. I needed time to adjust my expectations.
Retirement is a massive change, and you will need time to adjust to your new lack of structure. Take it. Rest. Try a purposeful sabbatical, but don’t allow your lack of structure become your new structure. Recognize that there will be some changes in your life, perhaps major changes, and be prepared for them.
Use your sabbatical to celebrate your work, examine your priorities, and determine goals for this next stage of life. I know, it’s a lot of thinking, but you can do that in a hammock in your back yard or walking the beach or hiking in the mountains. Hopefully this pondering will prepare you for the changes that will be coming.
Embrace change
The Bible doesn’t speak of change directly; it assumes it. We all change all the time, and God puts circumstances in our lives to direct some necessary transformation. Perhaps he desires our faith to grow, and we endure a difficult change, or maybe he wants our empathy to increase, so he changes our route to meet people for whom we feel compassion. If God is good, and he is, and if he wants us to grow closer to him, which he does, then change is always positive.
Camilla Seabolt, former executive director of Community Bible Study, memorably said, "When you are walking with the Lord, change is always in your favor."
When change comes, embrace it, believe that it is always for your benefit, and trust God through the change. If you’re like me, it may take a while, but you’ll get there. Embrace change like you’re hugging a good friend.
“Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed— in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed.” 1 Corinthians 15:51-52
Photo by Roger Bradshaw on Unsplash
Note: Parts of this article were taken from one of my earliest Reimagining Retirement posts that not too many of you read.